Powerful Non-Defensive Communication™ (PNDC™)
PNDC™ allows each person to speak with clarity, power and compassion without being dependent on others for cooperation. It gives us the tools to protect ourselves without getting defensive and to achieve our goals without resorting to power struggle. As a result, others often drop their own defenses, sometimes instantly – even in high conflict situations. Using this paradigm, we can see a different side of human nature and we have the potential to transform our relationships, creating a new reality through simple conversation.
Small Changes, Big Impact
The PNDC™ process is easy enough for children to learn while challenging and inspiring for adults. It is often surprising the effect that making simple adjustments to our tone, body language and facial expression can have in combination with phrasing. When we wash away the confusing layers of mixed messages, our desire to connect and know one another comes through with unprecedented clarity.
A Revolutionary Approach for Eliminating Defensiveness
Traditional communication methods use the rules of physical combat as the basis for verbal communication – consistently creating and gravely accelerating needless conflict. This plays out in history and in our biological mandate for survival – when we perceive danger, a physiological reaction overrides reason, better judgment and presence of mind. So how can we avoid this? Or defuse it, once it’s been put into motion?
With reciprocity at the heart of the model, PNDC™ changes how we interact at a foundational level. This innovative practice teaches us how to ask disarming questions, without triggering the other person; give honest feedback, without judgment; state opinions strongly, without alienating others; and create clear boundaries, without making people feel controlled or punished – all in a way that is consistently grounding for both parties.
More Than A Technique, A New Way of Being
Many people have shared remarkable stories of transformation after a brief exposure to the PNDC™ process. In this way, the primary tools: curious, clarifying questions / respectful feedback / accountable self-expression / and clear boundaries that protect all sides can be used immediately. At the same time — as with any physical, mental or spiritual discipline — to deeply internalize the mind-, heart-, and skill-sets of this new paradigm requires focus over time. And, in our experience, deepening the PNDC™ practice can profoundly shift our mental, emotional and spiritual viewpoint. Strangely enough, we have even seen physical changes in people when their rigid lines and sharp edges soften as walls, judgement and masks fall away.